Marriage – That Typical Advice

"Guys I'm looking for a girl these days. I guess I will be a married man by next year," said Haroonian, my college friend.

That was a Saturday night and the three of us (Haroonian, Raja and I) were at my place having tea. After that session at my place many more sessions came around and we discussed Haroonian's marriage programme. The main request of Haroonian was:

"Brothers! I'm getting married and so both of you should too."

I looked at Raja with an unbelievable expression when Haroonian asked that. He always used to stay calm at Haroonian's requests.

After trying several times Haroonian used to Pray for us to get married.

"Brothers! I won't be able to meet you guys when I get married." Haroonian with a smile.

We tried to make Haroonian understand not to make things horrible for himself. When the time comes along with the right moment, everything will be clear and fine.

"We will but we never know." Raja replied seriously. "At least Maulvi (my preferred name as I wear a beard) can get married. Why are you delaying?"

"I'm not delaying."

"So when is the date?" Haroonian excitedly.

"What date?"

"He is delaying!" Haroonian with disappointment.

"He is!" Raja with a cunning smile.

Nothing came to my mind after sensing the situation so I tried to divert the attention. "Tell us how the girl hunt is?"

Days passed by waiting for Haroonian to get married; even a year. Haroonian did not get married but engaged. Raja attended the engagement function and where was I? Yeah, I was in my village looking after my land.

Haroonian came to my place to visit me after a month of his engagement.

"Let the three of us get married altogether!"

"Hahahahaha!"

That was the reply from me and Raja as always; at the same session. Haroonian recalled one thing suddenly:

"Where were you Maulvi? Why didn't you attend my engagement?"

"Brother I totally forgot I'm so sorry. In fact something came up. I will be there at your wedding don't worry." I assured Haroonian. Raja was laughing.

Many more sessions came by and gone away just like that and all that contained was the idea to get married altogether. I never got the idea but Raja got it. He started seeing a girl and Haroonian told me all this story when Raja started missing our sessions at home.

"He is on a date!"

"He got it."

"He’s awake at nights and sleeping all day! Ain't that amazing?"

These were the liners thrown towards me from Haroonian telling me the current affair of Raja; also to motivate me to become the part of the big idea (Friends getting married at the same time).

Later on, Raja told the whole story at a session with a sad ending without any sign of grief. The reason was:

"Parent's Disagreement!"

I recalled the time when we all friends were applying for Canada for higher studies and the whole plan was dumped into a trash when one of our friend just could not make it due to:

"Grandparent's Disagreement!"

You feel bad for a while but in the longer course of life whatever happens, happens for the best. You just realize that fact later when you experience it. (I so wanted to go to Canada!)

Haroonian was back all alone in the getting married club. After 1 year he got married. He was very happy and all went more than perfect. There was one thing he quoted that time:

"Maulvi! I won't be able to attend Saturday night sessions at your place anymore. I wish I could continue with that. I'll see you soon."

"Insha'Allah!"

"Insha'Allah!"

That was the feeling which all of us feel when we move to college and in the back of our minds lay a tiny mixture of fear and grief saying that you can never be a school boy/girl ever again in your life. Beyond my belief Haroonian was there at my place on the very next Saturday with a smile. I got so happy to see him and also because he made it look possible to go back to school; again. That was a good surprise for all of us but Haroonian's regular new ideas (not really) kept on bumping.

"Brothers just get married then you will know it."

"You both don't know how much fun it is. Get married."

"There are two girls one for you and one for you. What say?"

"Brothers get married and feel the pleasure."

"First I just used to sleep; now I sleep completely."

"I don't have words to make both of you understand; just trust Allah and there you go."

"Don't be late!"

Yes, the lines above from Haroonian and many more during the sessions were witnessed. Later on, he started to pressurize us more:

"Brothers, trust me I really want you to know what experience I'm having these days."

"The more you get late, the more it’s not worth it."

"As soon as you become the member, the greater it is."

Raja and I were fed up of the weekly doze but Haroonian never stopped. Even Raja started missing the Saturday Night Sessions but Haroonian showed up continuously. Raja started teasing him regarding the marriage club; but Haroonian was cool with it.

After a long time the three of us got together for the session and each one of us were telling stories regarding our home, professional and personal experiences. It was a good time but Raja and I noticed that Haroonian's mobile started beeping with regular intervals (reminders for text messages). The text message tone was some kind of a whistle (Whoo Whoo Whoo Whooooo Whooo! - Samsung’s probably).

It did not stop in the next three four sessions; in fact it never stopped. The Haroonian's new nick name became (Whoo Whoo Whoo Whooooo Whooo!).

During one session I stopped laughing and asked Haroonian:

"Who is texting you that much?" It was obvious but due to so much laughing I could not get the fact that time.

"It is your Bhabi; who else?"

"Hahahahah!" (Raja and I at the same time).

"You guys making fun of me, shame on both of you."

After laughing so much more for a while Haroonian came up with the one typical advice:

"Brothers! Let me tell you one thing."

"And that is?" (Raja and I at the same time).

"NEVER GET MARRIED!"

Three Interviews, Three Creative Directors (The One Side of the Story!)

1: Show me your best work.

2: What was your last pay?

3: Which campaign you like the most?

1: Why did you leave?

2: Come to me I will teach you strategy.

3: You have a very interesting CV.

1: I will pay you much much more than your previous agency.

2: You are an MBA graduate, why COPY?

3: Indian commercials are entertaining,

1: Your work is OK.

2: We work here till midnight, sometimes till 2:30 AM.

3: We are here to sell not to entertain.

1: If I were your boss, I would have asked you to do the job again.

2: Also research…..

3: I worked there, there and there!

1: We can’t pay you that much….

2: What are your expectations from us?

3: It’s our job to convince.

1: Money will come later (Never).

2: Just write down the figure.

3: I am also Jatt (Caste).

1: Why are you scolding me (Smiling)?

2: Do you know what those girls used to do?

3: Which celebrity will you suggest to promote such a campaign?

1: There is a girl working here…..

2: You start working here.

3: Give me a line…!

1: You should see her work.

2: I worked on all those accounts.

3: Have you ever proofread a tender?

1: And she got a package of 60K with just 6 months experience.

2: Sundays are on.

3: How you are going to sell it?

1: Listen, when I started, I worked for free.

2: Will you be able to do what the girls are capable of doing? (Laughing)

3: Your increment depends totally on the client’s feedback.

1: If you work with patience things will turn in your favour.

2: That figure is too much.

3: There is something called LUCK!

1: 3 years of work experience (Patience) is not enough for you.

2: The market is coming to us, we are the future; so should you.

3: What are the accounts you worked on?

1: And later we will give you a raise.

2: I’m not the only one to take such a decision.

3: Come on let’s get started.

1: The agency you worked in don’t have the sense to work.

2: I will try to push the package….

3: Ok now get ready for the TEST. Written Test (Admission Test).